Low Season "Heavenly Creatures" 12"
by Low Season
We deal with a lot of weird cunts, strange dudes and genuinely odd people but rarely do we release stuff that people would call "weird shit" (if you ignore the fact that hardcore itself is absolutely bizarre). This definitely counts as "weird shit" for us. There is that old saying that "weird people are the best people" and more often than not they are just kinda fucken punishing and you get sick of having to deal with their quirks but I digress, this record, proves that sometimes weird IS GOOD.
Like walking in on your brother masturbating to porn in the living room on your Dad's work computer when he thinks everyone in the house is out there is a lot thats bizarre and entertaining about this record.
It's a very relatable record for the most part, talks about some fairly day to day struggles, sex, drugs, not being able to soar like an eagle when surrounded by turkeys, there is a shopping list thrown in as lyrics in there at one point and there are a bunch of noises in there that should come from 80's space themed pornos (don't pretend you've never watched these in the living room on your dad's work computer when you thought everyone in the house was out, we both know you have).
To run with the pornographic theme I've started with I guess this record, in the context of the Death's Grip showcase, is a lot like that tab you opened up by accident when you started your session. You're fapping your way through the pages and fast approach the vinegar stroke (is it called that for chicks too? genuinely curious here, female masturbation is largely a mystery to me. It's not that I don't know chicks get their diddle on, its just that they don't talk about it for the most part. Like a dude will wank at work in the dunnies, shake hands with someone an hour later and tell whoever will listen he came whilst wanking with that hand a few hours earlier, chicks on the other hand do not do that?
ANYWAYS you're fast approaching climax and you're furiously clicking tryna get at that video you loaded up of that dude with the engorged monster cock and rock hard abs/huge titted anal bandit chick taking an absolutely destroying when you HIT THAT STRAY PAGE and you find yourself spraying your shit in a joy of ecstasy to a dude eating pasta dressed in a turtle suit getting his arse eaten by a chick with a dick and flames tattooed down their arm and YOU'RE STILL CUMMIN and part of you is like "OHH WHAT THE FUCK" and another part of you is like "ITS ALL GOOD, JUST GO WITH IT" and then theres a little tiny part, buried under the shame, that's like "FUCK IT MAYBE I LIKE THAT, MAYBE THATS WHY I DIDNT CLOSE THAT PAGE, MAYBE SUBCONSCIOUSLY I WANTED TO 'ACCIDENTALLY' CLICK THAT PAGE, WHO GIVES A FUCK? NOBODY WAS WATCHING" and then you look up and there is your brother looking down at you from the entrance to the living room asking "yo, why are you having a wank on Dad's work computer?
And you're like "........ I didn't think anyone was home"
This record is a split release between us and our homie Jordan at Lack Lustre records.